Controlled

I am pretending happy now??
I carry on my life, I do not want to feel guilty or what when he sees me as sad Moon.
But everytime after I pretend that I am fine, I hide my sad or poker face from my friends...
I opened the door, he was in front of me.
With his poker face, I tried my best to smile and said "Good Morning" to him.
And I lost my way, incident: Actually I planned to use the lift to go down, after meeting him, I walked to the stairs.. And Wendy asked me why I was using the stairs... *Embarrassing*
Later in the tutor room, I kept playing around, opened my mouth to talk, to show him I am fine without him.
He saw me happy with my life now, I still the playful Moon.
I winked to my friends, he had no response to all those silly stuffs I did.
I totally ignored his existence.
Cause I did that to all guys in the lecture hall.
Cause I do not really care of other guy friends, except him...

I talked about Ah Yik, the junior, I show that I am happy whenever I talk about him, and ya, I hide the emptiness from my friends after that, because he is not really the source of my happiness.
Ming is the one...

But he do not care.
His new spec with black box, the old one is with white box, with his drawing in the lecture hall by pen.
Why he wears full time??
It will become a habit and later really have to wear all the time.
He changes his belt too, a striking white color.
His hair style is nice.
His scent is ok.

And I feel something when thinking of who is the lucky girl that he wants to attract, that can make him put effort to style his hair, wear smart, put cologne everyday.

I still experience the pain.